Life's Tidbits

A year ago I married my best friend and love of my life.  Our special day feels like so long ago and yet at the same time like it was yesterday.  It is one of those days I would absolutely love to relive.  Exactly a year late my husband and I celebrated our 1 year anniversary in style!  After a romantic weekend away in Charlottesville we celebrated the actual big day with a glass of wine on the balcony followed by dinner at Tosca.  Tosca has some AAAmazing Italian food!!  If you go to this place you MUST MUST MUST try the Rosemary and thyme fettuccine with a roasted leg of lamb ragu and braised artichokes … it’s absolutely to die for!

Read the rest of this blog here.

A few days ago a friend of mine linked from her Tumblr account to this Huffington Post article.  The article “15 Ways to Stay Married for 15 Years” by Lydia Netzer has a lot of great advice on thing she and her husband have learned throughout the years together.  All her tips are a home run - in my opinion - the only one I really can’t decide if I totally agree with or not is “Go to Bed Angry”.  Although I see her point I would almost want to modify to say “sometimes go to bed angry”.

I’ve noticed a lot of married couples have their own tips/tricks to a long and successful marriage and I enjoy hearing their tidbits.  AND … with the husband and I quickly approaching our one year anniversary together I often think this  first year was a great start to the rest of our lives together!  I hope to write my own 15 tips for saying married in 14 years and 1 month. :)

Photo Credit: Korie Lynn Photography

One of my absolute favorite pieces of advice is #12.  So FRIENDS I make this husband (and wife) pact with you …

“12. Make a husband pact with your friends - The husband pact says this: I promise to listen to you complain about your husband even in the most dire terms, without it affecting my good opinion of him. I will agree with your harshest criticism, accept your gloomiest predictions. I will nod and furrow my brow and sigh when you describe him as a hideous ogre. Then when your fight is over and love shines again like a beautiful sunbeam in your life, I promise to forget everything you said and regard him as the most charming of princes once more. The husband pact is very useful because you want to be able to vent to your friend without having her actually start hating your husband. Because you don’t really mean all those things you say. And she, the swearer of the pact, knows this.” source

The husband and I always say we are a team and it’s kind of become our thing.  So much so that we made sure the word team was in our wedding vows and made team sweat suites for the morning after our wedding.  Due to my love of the team mentality tip #14 really hit home for me …

“14. Be loyal.  All the crap you read in magazines about honesty, sense of humor, communication, sensitivity, date nights, couples weekends, blah blah blah can be trumped by one word: loyalty. You and your spouse are a team of two. It is you against the world. No one else is allowed on the team, and no one else will ever understand the team’s rules. This is okay. The team is not adversarial, the team does not tear its members down, the team does not sabotage the team’s success. Teammates work constantly to help and better their teammates. Loyalty means you put the other person in your marriage first all the time, and you let them put you first. Loyalty means subverting your whims or desires of the moment to better meet your spouse’s whims or desires, with the full understanding and expectation that they will be doing the same. This is the heart of everything, and it is a tricky balance. Sometimes it sways one way and sometimes the other. Sometimes he gets to be crazy, sometimes it’s your turn. Sometimes she’s in the spotlight, sometimes you. Ups and downs ultimately don’t matter, because the team endures.” source

What do you think of Lydia Netzer’s tips?  Is she missing any important tidbits?  Do you like the husband pact?

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Big, BIG things happening for us as of late.  Apparently we don’t know how to do low key/boring. :)

2010 - Engagement
2011 - Wedding/Honeymoon
2012 - PURCHASE OUR FIRST HOME!!!!!!!!!!
2013 - ??? I’m sure we will find something to spice things up next year!

Remember back in February when we turned 30 and went on our lovely trip to Mexico? Well the day before we left for vacation we found out the owner of the condo we rent is planning to sell.  What did this mean for us? Well it meant we had to move and do it within the next few months.  STRESSFUL! The thought that we would need to move, or that our apartment would be sold, was nowhere on our radar.

We had planned on building up our saving account a little more and then purchasing our first home.  The plan was to move at the end of the summer (or possibly early 2013).  With the news of an impending sale coming our way, the purchasing timeline was moved up.  Our move out date was no longer being driven by our savings account but by our current landlord’s desire to sell.

Despite our initial freakout everything has worked out pretty well.  We have a friend who’s a realtor so we called him the day we found out about needing to move and he got us hooked up with the lender that afternoon.  Within a week of coming back from vacation we were preapproved for a place and ready to start the big search.

While we were drinking margaritas and relaxing on the beach the husband and I came up with our must have and like to have lists for our first home.

Here is what our list looked like in order of priority …

Must Haves:

1. Within our ideal price range
2. In DC (not Maryland or Virginia)
3. Pet Friendly - we can’t part with little Miss. Sophi!
4. 2 bedrooms
5. Washer/Dryer
6. Walking distance to a metro

Like to Haves:

1. Parking Space
2. Plenty of Storage
3. 1.5 or 2 bathrooms
4. Patio and/or balcony
5. Fireplace

I felt like this was a pretty good list to begin with and began stalking RedFin for listings. After looking at a few condos in person, our must have list started to change a little.  We quickly realized a large living/dining area was important to us.  Small bedrooms were okay as long as the living space was big.  I feel like I do two to three things in the bedroom.  Sleep, get dressed and watch tv. I don’t need a massive amount of space for any of those.  Also, it became very clear places under ~800 sq feet were just too small.  As it turns out the one bedroom we rent is slightly over ~800 square feet so when you add a second bedroom but don’t increase the size of the unit the living space shrinks considerably.  TIP: find out the square footage of your current place before you start looking at places (to rent or buy).  This  will help you to gauge what square footage is ideal for you.

After viewing at least 20+ places in person and probably over 100 online we ended up putting an offer in and after a week of negotiations the place was officially UNDER CONTRACT.  WOOT WOO!!!

Based on our initial list we end up with the following:

Must Haves:

1. Within our ideal price range - FAIL we went over the initial budget
2. In DC (not Maryland or Virginia) - CHECK
3. Pet Friendly - CHECK
4. 2 bedrooms - CHECK
5. Washer/Dryer - CHECK
6. Walking distance to a metro - CHECK

Like to Haves:

1. Parking Space - Fail
2. Plenty of Storage - Fail … well kind of.
3. 1.5 or 2 bathrooms - CHECK
4. Patio and/or balcony - CHECK
5. Fireplace - Fail

PLUS our living/dining room is HUGE and get a ton of natural light, win win!!  Overall I would say we made out VERY well with our first homeowner purchase.

Looking back at the process here are a few things I think we did right and a few more I wish we had done:

• Go with your gut. If you love it then you love it and if you don’t there are always more places coming onto the market so don’t settle.  For those of you who purchased a wedding dress and had “this is THE dress” moment that will happen for your home too!
• View a lot of places and even take a look at places you aren’t sure look great online. Not all places photograph well (or the owner just puts up crappy pictures).  We found a few I wasn’t sure about online and then really liked in person.
• Remember the paint color (or wallpaper) can always be changed!
• Determine what the deal breakers are. For example I hated when the second bedroom didn’t have a window (which didn’t come to light until we saw a few places like this).  It didn’t bother my husband, but we agreed when things are a deal breaker for one of us then the place is out.
• Figuring out what you can afford and comfortable spending BEFORE you start looking and don’t look out places above your price range.  I mean let’s be honest if you find a place for 100k that you like, but then look at a place for 500k 9 times out of 10 you are going to like the more expensive place.  Just don’t tease yourself it isn’t worth it I promise (same thing goes for wedding dress brides!!!).
• Going back to the first choice place at least once before putting in an offer or shortly there after. It felt so good to walk into the condo and confirm I LOVED it.
• Getting the paperwork in order while looking for a place. I wish I had asked the Lender for a list of the paperwork we were going to need to provide (bank statements, w-2s, paychecks, etc) to get fully approved.  The documents takes a while to compile and if you are like me, you might have forgotten how to access some of your 401k accounts online.
• Don’t take the negotiations personally.  The seller wants the highest price possible and you want the lowest.  Some back and forth is to be expected.  We had a hard time with this because we felt our initial offer was very reasonable/fair.

And remember to RELAX and try to ENJOY purchasing your first home!!

Related blogs coming up soon: Moving, painting and other homeownership related projects.

What tips do you have for a first time home buyer?  Do you have any pre-move in tips for us?

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We began our honeymoon in Positano and then we were off to Sorrento.  Day 6 was spent on the train heading north to Cinque Terre.  I read an entire book on the train ride!  After the extremely long train ride and then shlupping the luggage up a hill to the hotel we had officially arrived in Cinque Terre.  

Screen shot from Google Maps

We arrived at the #1 hotel in  Monterosso (per TripAdvisor) Hotel Villa Steno.  The hotel was great and our view was amazing.  The balcony came in handy during our stay and I definitely recommend a balcony with a view of the ocean. :)

Day 7:

After sleeping in a little we lathered up with sun tan lotion and headed to the beach! We spent the day ocean side reading, tanning and hanging out.  The beach was beautiful and while relaxing on the beach I read Sarah’s Key, which is a great book and I strongly recommend it.

After a drink on the balcony and taking in the beautiful views we decided it was time for some PIZZA! Nothing had compared to the first place we found in Positano, however we were going to try to find something at least close.  As always we used the TripAdvisor app on the iphone and decided upon Pizzeria Da Ely.  The pizza was very good and we were able to land a seat outside without having a reservation. :)  After a lovely dinner and bottle of wine we headed back to the hotel.  

Monterosso al Mare shuts down a lot earlier than Sorrento and Positano did.  For us this was a good thing, because the next day we planned to hike the 5 cities of Cinque Terre!

Day 8:

We woke up early, which was a nice change and headed directly to breakfast.  After breakfast we packed water bottles, sunscreen and the camera into our backpack and headed towards the trail for our big hike.  We hiked from Monterosso to Vernazza.  I honestly don’t think I’ve ever sweat so much in my entire life.  It was SO hot and although the hike wasn’t hard there were enough stairs to make it so I couldn’t control the sweating. Hahaha.  Sexy, right? Anyways after finally reaching Vernazza we stopped for lunch at Gianni Franzi.  I had the pasta with meat sauce it was A-Mazing.  After resting for a while we began the hike to Corniglia.  Once we arrived in  Corniglia it was time for a drink at a cute little bar.  The path from Corniglia to Manarola was closed for some reason so we would have to hop on the train to Manarola and then we could finish the hike through the cities.  The path closure was about all the level of excuses we needed to skip the last two cities (Manarola and Riomaggiore).  It was hot and we were tired from already hiking for the better part of the day.  We got on the train and headed back to our beautiful hotel.  We sat on the balcony, watched the sunset and savored our last evening in Cinque Terre.

Here are a few pictures from the hike:

So beautiful!!! Even though we didn’t finish the hike I am glad we enjoyed the portion that we did do.  I think if it wasn’t so hot then we would have done the whole thing.  On our last night we went to Il Casello for dinner.  The food was great and the view of the ocean was perfect.  I think this is a place that only takes cash though … just a little fyi/heads up if you decide to go.

Day 9 would be spent on the train to Rome - our final stop on the honeymoon.

Caio! See you in Rome!!!

Happy traveling.

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I feel like a bad blogger for only posting once last week, but hopefully you will forgive me since I was on VACATION!  The husband and I both turned 30 in February, GULP, and decided the best way to celebrate was a romantic getaway.

We’ve been to Ixtapa, Mexico a couple of times.  This however was our first time alone on vacation in Ixtapa.  We got a lot accomplished on this trip: nice tans, both read the Hunger Games trilogy, relaxed, swam, walked the beach and enjoyed some yummy food and margaritas! As you can see we took the R&R vacation idea very seriously. :)

Here are few of my favorite shots from the week.

Might seem repetitive, however we ate the same lunch every day. Chicken, salsa verde, guac and cheese quesadilla.

Bye bye Mexico!

Back to life and back to reality.  I’m sure glad we got this relaxing vacation in … we have got a lot going on in the next few months!

Happy vacationing!

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